Let Us Pray

In praying, we are often occupied with ourselves, with our own needs, and our own efforts in the presentations of them.  In waiting upon God, the first thought is of the God upon whom we wait.  God longs to reveal Himself, to fill us with Himself.  

Waiting on God gives Him time in His own way and divine power to come to us.  Before you pray, bow quietly before God, to remember and realize who He is, how near He is, how certainly He can and will help. 

Be still before Him, and allow His Holy Spirit to waken and stir up in your soul the child-like disposition of absolute dependence and confident expectation.  

Wait on God till you know you have met Him; prayer will them become so different.  And when you are praying, let there be intervals of silence, reverent stillness of soul, in which you yield yourself to God, in case He may have aught He wishes to teach you or to work in you. 

-Andrew Murray (b. 1828-?)

Friendship Fertilizer Recipe

You will need:

 

a Common Steak Knife

+

 an amazing best friend

+

2 pumpkins

=

Jessicas pumpkin appears a little timid...

Our Spiritual Air, that which we all share...

 

 

"There is a general stock of evil in the world to which we all contribute, or which, by God's grace, some may diminish; a vast and fertile tract of ungodliness, of low motives, of low aims, of low desires, of low sense of duty or no sense at all.  It is the creation of ages, that tradition; but each age does something for it, and each individual in each age does, if he does not advisedly refuse to do, his share in augmenting it, just as the chimney of every small house does something to thicken and darken the air of London.......  

 

 

 What fuel are you burning in your daily life the most?

 

 

 

......And this general fund or stock of evil touches us all like the common atmosphere which we breathe.  And thus it is that when you or I, even in lesser matters, do or say what our conscience condemns, we do really make a contribution to that general fund of wickedness which, in other circumstances and social conditions than ours, produces flagrant crime.  Especially if it should happen that we defend what we do, or make light of it, or make a joke of the misdeeds of others, we do most actively and seriously augment this common fund or tradition of wickedness." 

 

 

 -Henry Parry Liddon (1829-1890)

Love...

"Love is life, & loveless-ness is death. As the Grace of God changes a man's heart; and cleanses and sanctifies him, this is the great evidence of the change. 

This is the great difference which it makes; that he begins to grow in love, to lay aside self-seeking, and to live for others- and so he may know that he has passed from death unto life.  

He may know it even here and now- why yes! that great discovery of love... that learning to live for others and finding the grace and gentleness that God is keeping up all over the world; even now it is the way from death to life.  

Even now it changes homes, it lightens every burden, it brings peace and gladness into the hardest days; it alters even the tone of a man's voice and the very look of his face.  

But all this, blessed and surpassing as it is, far above all else in the world, still is but the beginining.  for that life into which we pass, as God's dear grace of love comes in us and about us, is the very life of heaven." 

-Francis Paget (born 1851)

A bee sees......

The honey bee has five eyes to see the world around them! Although, not very well.

I kid, I kid ;-)

Due to writers block + the massive hoards of neurotic Bees lately, I have decided to do a little A-B-C (a-bee-sees...) survey about me so you can have a little background info (that has nothing to do with bees) I got from a fellow blogger that I follow;

Jen,that I hope puts a little wind in my sail! ...or wings..... bee wings....

*cough* anyways, herewego!

A. Age:

22

B. Bed size:

To keep with the theme… Queen. Queen B to be exact ^_^

C. Chore you dislike:

hmmMMMmm…. I’d have to say… day old dishes. ICK. I don’t mind doing them right away, but something about cold-icky-dirty-day+ old dishes in the sink!  Luckily I have developed an OCD good behavior pattern of washing them right away J

D. Dogs:  

Little Lou (Lucy) a mini-Daschund that I smuggled home as a pup whilst the parents were out of town. Luckily I was forgiven & we both earned our keep ;-)

& Kirby. Aka Kirbzilla, kirbyderby. The Zills. Toothless Wonder. 

He is an old man Pomeranian.

E. Essential start to your day:

Prayer. Getting up *alittlebitearly* to allow my morning to be relaxed and smooth. Like the coffee I drink. Another essential.

F. Favorite color:

hmm… to wear, black.. but in general, hmm…. I’d say Orange!

G. Gold or silver:

I’m gonna hafta say Gold actually. Reminds me of Egyptian artifacts! *Lurve*

H. Height:

5’8”

I. Instruments you play(ed):

Through-out middle school I played the Flute & picholo, but abandoned that ship due to a disease I had/have: hyperhidrosis. I also dabbled with the Harmonica a bit on my own time!

J. Job title:

I was a Nuclear Marine Electrician for the Navy (civilian) and worked on the systems on the Submarines & Aircraft Carriers; that I just left as I was getting married & moving.  But life is completely absolutely unpredictable. And during those times, well… time doesn’t stop. Fortunately it ended up being a real eye opener for the better & I am feeling very positive on this new chapter in my life.

K. Kids:

0!

L. Live:

A Land of lots of rain volcanoes, deserts, coastland, rainforests.... (some think vampires and warewolfs... ) sasquatch, all four seasons (They are: rain, rainy, rainy-er, and AMAZING)   ...Washington State!

M. Mom’s name:

Jane.

N. Nicknames:

My dad allllways calls me Tayter “Hey tayter! Hows your day going?!”

and in a fancy accent my younger sister always calls me “Leonardo” *pinky out*

O. Overnight hospital stays:

When I had my ETS surgery.

P. Pet peeves:

Negative Nancys^4! The sky is falling above my house Negative Nancys. I find Nancy to be the most common name these days ;-) but seriously, YOU are ultimately in control of how you react and think in the present moment. Not saying I don’t have a little Nancy in me (she hibernates a lot, but does come out if really stirred up)

 Another Pet Peeve…

 Super-potty-mouths.

Boys & girls. Especially on girls… it just sounds so sloppy and >>ICK<<   C’mon Ladies, we must keep some femininity!

Q. Quote from a movie:

There is a scene in “The Mummy” where he still isn’t fully organ-ized (thus has no tongue) and says “NaAfF nAaFff NAFFF!” 

My younger sister & I will randomly text each other it lol.

R. Righty or lefty:

Lefty!

S. Siblings:

2 sisters.  Jessica: 25.  Alisha:18.

T. Time you wake up:  

When I was working, it was 3:15am!  Now I aim for 6.  I love the peace of the early morning.

U. Underwear:

The sky is a slight overcast ;)

V. Vegetables you don’t’ like:

Leana + All Vegetables = BFF’s 4EVR.  I once wrote that in the sand.

Kidding ;)

W. What makes you run late:

Yikes. I am kinda a late-wad. Always Late.  My dear friend Jess has been my victim for a few years, but just like a snake bite, once I get there its like anti-venom :) 

Cause of Latewadding: Its usually trying to make sure all my ducks are in a row before I leave. 

And I’ll think they all are, so... I  take...my...time a little more, then get slammed with a broken-winged duck that I forgot about. 

I hope I don’t lose you with all my analogies.

HOWEVER, I am very good-work-ethicy and like to be on time / early to work! And I make it happen. (see letter E).

X. X-rays you’ve had:

soooo many.  Mouth for teeth and braces. Chest for Asthma (lungs) and numerous other reasons.

Y. Yummy food you make:

I am obsessed with cooking.  Currently I have two pumpkins awaiting their death.  I’d say my favorite foods I make are my Breakfasts. Usually some crazy concoction of a pancake(s).

Z. Zoo animal favorites:

well, at the zoo up here... I'd have to say the Walrus. I love being below the water level and watching him swim! Not only is he Ginormous, but... what the heck is it?! If you really think about it, they're such bizzaire creatures..



 It looks like a baby mouse that was exposed to radiaton!

There are no more Letters.

A-Z: COMPLETE.

I hope you enjoyed and it gave a little insight to you about me! I will be posting more regularly >>soon<< about daily doings, cooking, cool exercise routines and various spontaineous writes!

Thank you for reading!

PART III: TREATMENT

-Quick Hyperhidrosis Overview-

Hyperhidrosis is a debilitating condition that affects nearly 1% of the earths population. 

It is characterized by:

excessive sweating that can be socially embarrassing, career restricting, & in some cases, very disabling. Patients with hyperhidrosis suffer from excessive sweating that commonly involves one or several parts of the body, including the hands, feet, axillae (underarms), or, less often, the face. It can be triggered by exercise, stress, and/or embarrassment, but most commonly it is completely without any triggers; it just happens. 

Hyperhidrosis most commonly presents itself as extreme — even dripping— wetness of the hands, rendering the patient too uncomfortable to shake hands, making paperwork and writing difficult, and often leading to uncomfortable skin conditions.

How does sweating work?

The sympathetic nervous system, which is a part of the vegetative nervous system, pushes electrical signals to the sweat glands on the surface of the body when the body thinks that it needs to be cooled down. The peripheral nerve fibers begin with small nodes of ganglia located sequentially in a chain passing along the side of the spine.

This makes up the sympathetic trunk.
With excessive sweating these signals are being sent when they are not needed. It is unknown as of yet exactly why this is occurring.

TREATMENT OPTIONS

Anti perspirants

 Deodorant... we all wear it (well... most of us).  The main component in Deodorant that keeps that sweat from coming out so much, is aluminum chloride. The higher the %, the better it works. Unless you have a condition that eats aluminum chloride for breakfast ...Hyperhidrosis.  

 

My experience:

Drysol did nothing to lessen my sweating and the only thing it did was irritate my skin.  My sweat glads were not phased.. deodorants only purpose for me was to de-odorize my pits.

 

 _________________________________-

I o n t o p h o r e s i s

The hands or feet are placed into water (the deeper part of the trays are filled with water) ...and then a "gentle" current of electricity (15-18A via a D/C generator) is passed through it. The electricity is gradually increased until the patient feels a light tingling sensation. The therapy lasts about 10-20 minutes. It requires constant reapplication thereafter otherwise sweating will reoccur. Many who suffer from light to moderate hyperhidrosis are content with this method, however the treatment is time consuming and can cause discomfort. It is very difficult to apply to the armpit region and impossible in other areas.

My experience:

Painful. Feels like your nails are being pulled off, tedious... and did not suppress my sweating to a degree worth continuing treatment.

 _______________________________________________

B o t o x

Another popular hyperhidrosis treatment is.... botox! [Botulinum toxin type A] -It was approved by the FDA in 2004 for the treatment of severe underarm sweating [primary axillary hyperhidrosis]. Botox is one of the most lethal poisons known, as it interferes with the effect of the transmitter acetylcholine... (In the peripheral nervous system acetylcholine plays a role in skeletal muscle movement, as well as in the regulation of smooth muscle and cardiac muscle. In the central nervous system acetylcholine is believed to be involved in learning, memory, and mood) ...at the synapses; In low doses however, it can reduce the transition of impulses and thus sweating activity. The procedure is as follows: iodine/dye is rubbed on the armpit to locate sweat glands.  Then a grid is dotted out on your armpit to mark injection locations. Then, small doses of botox are injected into each of these spots. It isn't your usual shot & rather discomforting. I had 25 dots in each pit. This temporarily blocks the nerves that stimulate sweating. The effect usually lasts between 2 and 6 months (mine only last 2...). The treatment must then be repeated to continue suppression of the sweating.

 

Mr. Sweat G. Lands newest hobby after botoxin'

 

Some side effects of this method could include:

injection-site pain and flu-like symptoms, mild but temporary weakness and intense pain. Also it is a costly treatment, especially given that it must be redone continuously. Botox is most commonly used for underarm sweating, and it is not suitable for large areas ...*insert OW here* Botox is not used in the palms and feet because it can cause temporary weakness of the hand & foot muscle.

 

 

My Experience:

I received botox by my medical provider (insurance covered it thank the Lord!) ..twice.  The first time was painful but worth it, my armpits ceased sweating for almost two months, and it was really exciting as a 16 year old to be able to wear prettier shirts! BUT.... the pit water returned & my 2nd treatment proved unsuccessful. I also still suffered from severe sweating everywhere-else. 

_______________________________________________________

 

Endoscopic Thoracic Sympathectomy (ETS)

involves...

interrupting a specific portion of the main sympathetic nerve, which is a part of the autonomic nervous system. The sympathetic nerve "chain" is made up of a network of nerves that branch off from the spine and form next to the ribs in the chest.

Each sympathetic nerve branch originates from a bundle of cells called a "ganglion." 

Through two small incisions under the armpit (approximately half an inch) a specific ganglion that causes sweating is located and removed. Then the signal which tells the body to sweat in a specific region is "turned off", reducing localized hyperhidrosis. The exact ganglion that is removed depends on the area of excessive sweating that is being treated.

A general anesthetic is administered for the operation. 

When the patient is asleep...

 (looks comfortable enough.....)

....a small opening is created in the upper chest through the ribs. The lung on the side being operated upon is collapsed to give more  r o o m  to work. 

 

Then a camera on the end of a telescope is inserted through the ribs to track and find the nerves which are to be cut & once it has been found, two other holes are made so that the cutting tools can be inserted. 

Once the nerve has been cut and titanium clips are clamped on the severed ends, the tools are removed and the lung is expanded. To ensure that all the air has been removed from the chest cavity, a plastic tube may be left in so that any air trapped in the chest cavity can escape. 

The operation is then repeated for the nerves on the other side. The surgery amazingly only usually takes about 2 hours! The operation is mostly an overnight operation, and a stay of a few days afterwards is usually ordered.

SIDE EFFECTS

• The operation can lead to excessive dryness of hands, such that moisturizing cream must be applied to avoid the skin cracking.

• Compensatory sweating often occurs on other places. This sweating generally occurs on the back, and also can be on the feet and legs. Also there may be sweating on the side of the face when eating. Compensatory sweating tends to occur more frequently with and operation to fix axillary hyperhidrosis.

• Gustatory sweating may occur, this is the increase of sweating when smelling specific foods which are strong, spice or sour.

• Neuralgic pain.

• Drooping of the eyelid due to nerve damage, this usually is temporary. If this occurs then a plastic surgery procedure called a blepharoplasty is required.

• Ribs may be sore and painful during breath while coughing, this is normally temporary.

• Artery damage

• Nerve damage

• Inability to control body temperature

• Inability to raise the heart rate and thus work out physically

 

 

MY EXPERIENCE

On July 21st 2006, at 17 years old... I had ETS done.  I stayed in the hospital 3 days. I immediately woke up with soft warm dry hands.....! Recovery was painful as the tissue between my ribs was cut, and I had a lot of burning nerve pain.   

To sum it all up in a few sentences... This procedure CHANGED my life... for the better. Yes.... I have side effects. My left hand sweats more than my right, my right hand gets really dry.  I have burning nerve pain in my back a lot.  I have pretty severe night sweats frequently... 

 yeah... thats my shirt. sometimes I change my shirt 3-4 times a night.

My body temperature can suddenly fluctuate dramatically from cold to hot or hot to cold resulting in suddenly feeling like I'm burning up and thus profusely sweating on my back/stomach/face.  Cardio is hard for me because my heart is working extra hard when pushing myself to such exertions.

BUT...

I wouldn't take the surgery back for a second.  It is a case of.. 45 steps back... 1,000,000 steps forward. Being able to wear normal clothes, feel like a girl... write on a piece of paper without ruining it, shaking a hand... holding a hand, give a hug... open a door, drive a car, wear flip flops-  things you just don't think about and take for granted in a normal life.  I thank God everyday for blessing me with such a successful surgery as I know there are a lot of people that have experienced life changing problems.. for the worse.

 

 

An Unexpected Visitor...

Ironically, after the surgery I hit what I'd say was the darkest part of my life. I was now a senior in High School. I could wear normal clothes! NaMe BrAnDs... I wanted to be PoPuLaR in high school -something I never had experienced. I lost touch with true friends and most importantly.. my true self. I hid my farm-girl video-game playing self. I wanted to be cool and go to parties. I drank. I showed more skin. I pretended to be someone I wasn't. 

 

All of the things I'd consider my "lowest points" were this year period after my surgery.  Luckily that phase didn't last long after graduation and my journey to serve the Lord has recovered and flourished.

 

 

***Disclaimer***

I am not a licensed professional or doctor of any sort and before you proceed with any of these methods of treatment.. do your research and talk to your doctor.  

If you have anymore questions about my surgery, current life, or anything else; feel free to comment or email me!

Cowgirl12685@hotmail.com 

 

 

Vanity, not so elusive.

 ......V A N I T Y

Inspiration. 

What kind of inspiration do you think your are, obsessing over certain muscle groups in your body as a whole? Slaving... away at a gym to perfect a certain part of your body, to feel self-satisfied, and please a judge, for a prize that has no worth in the true life, the life lived for Christ.  

The erosion of relationships with friends & family because they "don't understand" the importance of your "contest" diet, your consumption of vanity, so to speak. 

Your "pre-contest" behavior, grouchyness, attitude. 

Trying to mask your behavior and blaming it on your "diet" is sad.  Do you realize how that sounds? "sorry for snapping at you honey, its just this diet I'm on for my contest; this diet to deprive my body of water & get more lean; so my muscles show better so I can get a color sprayed on me that will expose my muscles even better under a bright light so a bunch of judges can judge my body, hair, and walk while wearing a tiny piece of cloth over the smallest amount of skin covering my private parts, so I can win a crown and title for having a amazing body that I obsessed over for the last few months. Thank you for understanding!"  

....How un-inspiring it must be to the girl that struggles with her weight; who would love to just go down a few sizes, to see girls that are near-perfect in so many peoples eyes, obsessing over some part of their body that they need to "improve" on in order to place higher at their next "competition".   

The displaying of your body in ways that cause men to be tempted.  Regardless if your butt-crack or nipples are covered, you are nearly naked and still causing temptation and practicing lack of self-respect & lack of morals. 

The true Beauty of a Woman. 

As a woman, we naturally carry less testosterone. 

We are supposed to have more "fat" in our chest, our hips... our body. A necessary fat to be able to provide a living environment for another life in our own bodies. 

Christ is in us, and takes care of us.  We cannot sustain this Body of Christ without proper nourishment and care. Prayer. Following him, not just knowing what his word is.  The same goes for our body providing a wonderful environment for a new life. We as women are not meant to be so lean, it is not a healthy environment for a devloping baby.

It is not attractive and is a distorted image you become a prisoner of. It is a temptation that breeds another tempation. A sin that produces another sin, and another.  Before you know it, you're on a stage in barely any clothing being judge on your way to "please" the crowd, "pose" and show your body, your "tan" and your "walk".

Gluttony.  It isn't just over-consumption of food.  How pathetic it is to focus so much on eating x number of meals a day containing x and x and x. I wonder how many kids are in poverty-stricken countries, wondering if they may receive a small scrap of food in the next 24 hrs. Not 2 or 3. I am not judging, but will say, just because you believe in God and know his word, doesn't mean you are FOLLOWING it. I have been down this path, and do not regret it.  I learned a lot about myself, what is truely important to me, what happiness REALLY is, and most importantly, GOD. I thank him for still shining his light for me to see my way back as I traveled father down this path of deception.

I recently was browsing one a profile on facebook of a woman that I was very inspired by.  Though orginally sparked by her modeling/fitness career, I grew to be way more inspired by her love of life, family, and God. 

She recently posted a picture of what she looks like now, which is much softer and more feminine than her competing figure.  In a short summery, she wrote about why she decided to not compete anymore, or live that lifestyle- how she would rather have the body she has now, and the lifestyle, than her past.  I was so touched, as I had been blessed with recently seeing this light as well. Though I don't personally know her, I sent her a message about how amazing it was to see that, and hear that. Her response was so motivating and positive.  Her passion for the love of children was wonderful. It was amazing getting to talk to her!

This girl is a true woman of Christ, and a true inspiration to other women. Her is her latest blog post on it all:

Amanda Carrier's latest blog

Do I still workout? Yes. How often? once or twice a week, and I walk everywhere as often as I can. Do I still eat healthy? yes, its my choice to. I feel better when I eat whole rich foods, not processed, refined, additive fill foods. Who doesn't?  My body has naturally taken up a softer look, thank goodness! It is a hard process, allowing this improperly identified fat back in my life. But my clothes fit just as good, and my relationships with friends, family, TIME here on earth and GOD have flourished.  

My amazing parents and me; my crown worthless in the life lived for Christ. The real treasures by my side.

 __________________________________

 James 1:12-15

Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him. Let no one say when he is tempted, “I am being tempted by God,” for God cannot be tempted with evil, and he himself tempts no one. But each person is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desire. Then desire when it has conceived gives birth to sin, and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death.

 __________________________________

 1 John 2:16

For all that is in the world—the desires of the flesh and the desires of the eyes and pride in possessions—is not from the Father but is from the world.

___________________________________